Three words that make all stoners drop their bongs – surprise drug tests! They arrive at random and unless you’re ready to be booted from work, us potheads need to stick together and look out for one another.
Let me tell you about the wonders of fake pee and all the nuances of UPass Synthetic Urine. A long-time favorite in the fake urine game that could save your ass when you need it the most. Let’s see how old reliable stacks up in today’s market!
Finding Out About the Yellow Piss Road
I first found out about synthetic pee a few years ago at a friend’s place. We were passing the bong around and shooting the shit when someone brought up my friend Paul and how he lost his job because of a failed urine test. I had just landed a fairly lax corporate job and I had NO IDEA that people actually got drug tested IRL.
Worried and stoned, I asked my friend if I was going to be drug tested at my new job.
“Probably” he replied candidly.
I proceeded to freak-the-hell-out!
“What in the world am I going to do then?” I said “I’m literally screwed if I lose this job”.
“Relax” he said “you can just use fake stuff”
He then proceeded to tell me all about synthetic urine, and how I could use it to pass any urine test. He also mentioned that I needed to sneak it in without getting caught, and I needed to heat it up to the right temperature.
As soon as I got home, I hopped on my computer and searched the Internet for a solution. I didn’t have a lot of money and I only found fake urine that was WAY out of my budget. By sheer luck, I saw an ad for UPass Synthetic Pee – and I started my synthetic urine journey.
Knowing what I know now, I would’ve opted for Quick Fix back then. But I was a newbie in the game, and I hadn’t come across it.
Thankfully, UPass actually helped me pass! But this was a few years ago – since then, urinalysis has gotten a lot stricter.
What You Get in the Package
Everything you’ll need for your test comes in a handy little box, perfect for keeping things discreet! Here’s what you’ll find when you purchase UPass online:
- A thick plastic bottle that keeps heat well
- One Heating Pads
- Three oz. of solution
- A thermometer strip
- Two Hand-Warmers
- A simple rubber band
UPass Synthetic Pee Test and Review
For this review, I went the extra mile of buying a drug-testing kit and followed the instructions that came in the box to a tee. It really impressed me with the results! First, I nuked the bottle of urine in the microwave for about 10 seconds to get it to body temperature and gave it a good shake.
Afterward, I checked the pH level with an Alkaline acid test, which gave me a pH range of 6.2, safely in the normal range of urine. With my home kit, Upass passed with flying colors! No positive marks anywhere and after doing it twice to be safe, I was sure it was time to try it out for real!
Ingredients In Most Synthetic Urine
- Creatinine. This is waste created from the use and wearing down of muscles from everyday activities. Inside the bottle of fake pee is the right amount for your weight, because the more you weigh the higher your creatinine level should be.
- Urea. This is another waste product that also comes from muscles in your body, mainly including nitrogen that plays a big role in convincing the doctors that your pee is legit.
- Uric Acid. It plays a similar role to Urea, only this time it’s less toxic than urea, which can come out as number one or two.
- The proper pH range for human urine (4.5 to 8.0). If your fake urine is under or over this value, you might as well throw in the towel because either your pee is closer to drinking water or acid that’ll make your skin tingle.
- Color. If it looks like lemonade, be sure to return whatever seller you got it from, it’ll fail the moment you hand it over to a doctor.
- Aroma Upass’s synthetic pee has that public bathroom smell that hopefully will make the tester cringe and get the sample test.
Pros and Cons of UPass Synthetic Urine
No matter what, every product has its downsides and UPass isn’t without its flaws. But, for what it offers, the pros outweigh the cons!
- Very affordable at around $25-40 USD range (Price varies based on where you buy it).
- Thousands of users over the years use UPass as the go-to fake urine for passing a drug test (learn how to beat a weed drug test here).
- It’s unisex synthetic urine so you don’t have to worry about which sex you are.
- UPass also contains a preservative that allows it to be reheated and opened many times without ever becoming contaminated.
- You can use it in the bedroom – or the bathroom as a hygienic, toxin-free alternative for those who are fans of golden showers.
- Because it’s been around for a while and urinalysis has only gotten more advanced and precise with their testing. In recent years, their 100% pass guarantee has been lowered to 80% and a lot of reviews have come in and reported failing their drug tests.
- It doesn’t stay fresh as long as other competing synthetic urine kits that last for up to two years.
Here’s my alternative, which (spoiler alert) has less than a 0.02% fail rate. Quick Fix is the most popular product with the highest reported pass results.
Q: Does Fake Pee Expire?
Yes, depending on the brand of false urine, it can range from a few months to a year before going bad. You should keep it in a dry environment that’s safe from getting too hot or too cold. Otherwise, the delicate balance of chemicals can go out of whack without you knowing.
Q: A Cheap Get-Out-Of-Drug-Test Pass? It Sounds Too Good To Be True.
That’s because it has stripped everything to the bare essentials, a one-use heating pads and a bottle full of solution that has a thermometer sticker on it. This product, to me, is for those in search of an affordable option without cutting deep into a person’s budget.
Q: My Drug Test Is Today! How Do I Do This??
First off, don’t panic! You must act cool now and when the doctor asks for a sample. First, make sure it’s not too hot, use the thermometer and make sure it’s within 94-100 degrees. After that, just activate the heating pad around the bottle and wrap a rubber band around it and stuff it down your pants for safekeeping. Not yet done! Be sure to give the bottle a shake to get that frothy look and fill up the sample cup and dump the rest in the toilet.
Q: How Does Synthetic Urine Work?
It works by mimicking, the smell, the amount of waste inside of real urine, and even how frothy it is when you shake the bottle! Synthetic urine comes in either powder mix or pre-prepared fake pee in a bottle and it’s important you follow the instructions very carefully. Unless you’re willing to risk handing in what looks like lemonade to the nurse. It has components like water, creatinine, urea, pH balance, and/or uric acid make up the magic mix so you can keep your job and pass that joint on the weekends.
Q: I Read Online That Someone’s UPass Arrived Contaminated!
Maybe he didn’t order off a reliable website? There are many resellers who buy in bulk from the factory and sell it themselves at a higher price. Unofficial sellers could store them improperly, which leads to bad batches. I suggest buying straight from the Official Website or more reputable sellers online.
Opt for Quick Fix Instead
What’s great about UPass is that it’s cheaper than the average synthetic urine (more information) but it comes at a risk. I much prefer Quick Fix 6.2 (Read More)! It has a WAY higher success rate, costs around the same price and saves you a lot of time. No need to practice getting the mixture right like UPass – just heat it up and you’re good to go!